ChapterBuzzing

Great news! I signed up for a writing contest on ChapterBuzz!

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I’m starting a novel for a college class anyways, so I figured this contest came at just the perfect time for me! ChapterBuzz allows its users to post segments of their novels online, for other dedicated authors to read. My challenge for this month is to write 10,000 words… and since I have minimum 8,000 words due by this Sunday, I should hit that goal right quick!

According to the website, Andy Weir found success publishing his draft of The Martian chapter by chapter here. I’ve been looking for that site for a while, and it’s good to know I’m in good company!

Here’s the premise for my novel:

 

Two comedians, each best friends, are hired as digital strategists by rival presidential campaigns. Their jobs are to create the election-winning memes.

 

It’ll be a crazy ride, and you can check in here to see what I write! I’ll start updating soon!

Glimmer Train Winter 2015: “The Cabin” by Kurt Rheinheimer

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It’s always tricky, discerning when to include “useless” information or scenes. I’m not talking about, “I like this subplot but it’s pointless.” I’m more about, “I want to have a reader immersed by not breaking away from the action, but I still want each detail to communicate something.” It can be done well with authors like Cormac McCarthy, or filmmakers like Quentin Tarantino. But this kind of storytelling does not benefit from a huge info-dump at the beginning, which “The Cabin” unfortunately succumbs to.

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FRANKENSTEIN: The World Changes, We Stay The Same… And Vice-Versa

It’s FRANKENSTEIN FEBRUARY! That magical tie of year when I power through a generally shitty month by re-reading the greatest novel of all time! Mary Shelley’s best book is such an accurate reflection of humanity that I learn more about myself each time I revisit the tragic history contained within. And with this third re-read, enjoyed alongside an introduction by Maurice Hindle, I have arrived at a new truth: there is something seriously wrong with me!

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Caveman Grammar Police

 

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For the record, I wrote this skit without knowing about the Cyanide and Happiness strip. Preemptive defense ENGAGE!

CAVEMAN A sits on stage right, trying to set a piece of paper on fire by rubbing a stick between his palms. CAVEMAN B and CAVEMAN C walk in from stage left. CAVEMAN B carries a dead animal gored on a spear.

 

CAVEMAN B

(describing and pantomiming the great hunt he just took part in)

Uh jup hwat feet ja… ooo da ug! Fa tawat hacha uff uff! Sa wan a… whopa! Aug ma fa hoot hoot!

 

CAVEMAN C

(amazed, wanting to know how CAVEMAN B survived)

Waaa… ugg ne ha?

 

CAVEMAN B

(boastful)

Ugg ne ha? Nog nug fe gaaa… fa huwat! No ack ung bonk gronk!

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Searching For Reasons To Not Research

I hate research. It’s the number one aspect of writing that keeps me from actually putting pen to paper. The worst thing is, all this stress resides solely in my head. While I sit and write, I keep asking myself, “Do you know enough about this?” While I sit and research, I keep asking myself, “What if you’ll find something new and story-changing in the next hour?” And while I’m doing neither, I keep asking myself “Shouldn’t you be writing?” It’s madness, all of it. I seem hardwired to seek out all information that’s not relative to my life and to avoid any other bits of knowledge… but you all know I’m pursuing an English degree, so that revelation shouldn’t surprise you.

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I wish I knew who made this.

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We get it, Nick. You have lots of time on your hands.

Thing is… I really shouldn’t.

I started the daily blog updates so I’d have a goal each day. An anti-distraction as I recovered from surgery and drifted closer and closer to the siren song of YouTube. But now I’ve got actual schoolwork to do, including a novel I’m supposed to start… so yeah, no more daily updates.

Is this a return to the old ways? Not quite.

I like the current four-day schedule I’ve been doing, which I’ve now posted under the Mission Statement page. So you can expect something every Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, and Saturday from now on! If I have something else to share, like an announcement or a movie podcast, then those will be some in-between treats for people who follow my blog. Don’t get too complacent yet!

If there’s anything else you’d like to see me tackle on a weekly basis, feel free to let me know in the comments! For now, I think I’ll sign off for a bit. I’ve been battling eye strain all month…

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Glimmer Train Winter 2015: “Family of Four” by Samsun Knight

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In between showcasing shorter, less meaty works, Glimmer Train finds room for short stories that feel like entire novels. During its 44-page runtime, Samsun Knight takes his readers through all the perspectives in one family. The Family of Four consists of David (the father, who ruins his family life when his manic episodes take over), Jeremy (the son, angsty and horny, exorcising his struggles through science fantasy), Eleanor (the daughter, navigating a world of heartbreak and anxiety), and Matilda (the mother, who, after watching the household figuratively fall apart, watches it literally fall apart). In the tradition this Winter Issue sets up, “Family of Four” uses all of its 44 pages concisely and wisely. Well. For the most part. Maybe for 34 pages.

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